2-10 lame people in a photograph.

Can I talk about another website that I hate that everyone finds hilarious?

Hey, thank you!

Well, it’s called Hot Chicks with Douchebags and I’m sure you’ve been there and laughed at the foolish looking dudes who have intense tans, or ugly styled hair, or leave like, 5 buttons undone on their shirts while they’re partying in a Hummer Limo or whatever.
You have, right? And those guys are dopes. I guess I’d prefer to dream that people like that don’t walk the earth (living in Portland is pretty effective for this) at all, but yeah, they’re here they’re queer. Ew and ha. I get that that’s funny.

But what’s always ignored, I guess, is that these chicks with whom they’re hanging out are most likely totally gross too? I mean, surely their giant fake boobs that are busting out of their bikinis and club clothes and their own orange tans may not be evidence enough that these women are caught up in some weird gross world of striving to be some Playboy-style of hotness, but doesn’t the fact that they’re partying with these dudes and taking party pictures pursing their lips and sticking out their asses make them equally douche-y?

Besides, both sexes totally wear Ed Hardy, and it is appropriate for neither.

this girl

This girl's douchiness far outweighs the bro's. Corsets are not shirts. And close your mouth young lady.

These dudes are lame. And so are her ripped jeans. Bikini tops are not shirts.

These dudes are lame. And so are her ripped jeans. Bikini tops are not shirts. Also...the sunglasses?

Sister, do not

Sister, do not stick your buttocks out for one, let alone two gross-ass dudes to grope for a photographer. I'm sure you're drunk, but where's your friend to tell you "no" huh?


I guess I forget that while camo cargo shorts on a dude are douchey, a matching hat and embellished camo short-shorts on a chick are perfectly acceptable. Oh right, as long as she has giant tee-tas it's cool, yah? Don't even get me started about whatever nipple ring double standard I'm sure is in place...

this girl looks normal, right?

This girl looks normal, right? And yeah, totally pretty. Aside from whatever weird green-colored beverage she's drinking. Buuut she looks pretty cozy with ol' gel-hair-camo-shirt-big-chain guy, huh? I must assume the worst. She's a fool.

I know…I’m a killjoy.  I just think it’s lame and gross.  Because of the way these otherwise probably normal looking guys style themselves, they’re douchey, but the women who are totally douchey in the same way are still hot and just their accessory?

I say no no.




3 responses to “2-10 lame people in a photograph.

  1. subjectverbobject

    I kinda feel like you insulted about 90% of my wardrobe in this post. Who’s to say giant, plastic tits and camo anodized nipple rings weren’t edited out of every-single-one-0f Jane Austen’s novels? Hmm?

  2. Killjoy. HCWDB is GOLDEN!

  3. 1. Totally saw an excellent pair of douches whose picture would fit in nicely with this post [too many rings, she had her neck pierced (yes, her neck), and of course there were the requisite fake tans and douchey outfits].

    2. Hello. I loved running into you the other night.

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